Concave to Convex via Marriage

I’d been to a wedding recently. She was my classmate in college and during those sweet times, I’d a huge crush on her feet. Yes! they were so good, I wondered if having a crush on feet was normal. Anyway, I couldn’t just stand there and be lost in my memoirs of her feet. As with many marriages, this one had a good supply of most eligible bachelors and bacheloresses exhibiting themselves. Even though my eligibility criteria are far from good, I’d an awesome time ogling at the chicks dressed well, carrying themselves well and smiling as if that day would be their lucky day.

There was this seemingly unlimited free flowing melody ringing in my head from the violins and waltzes, every time I saw a very eligible chick. Little that I know that my time would change, and drastically so! There came a familiar face, only that it had bulged considerably compared to the last time I’d seen it. Studying the approaching structure, I realized that it was not just the face, but even the body sorta had a mini explosion inside with uncleared debris remaining. She was another classmate of mine walking up to us bunch of guys. We all had the same feeling looking at her. It was evident from their faces. “Dude.. How could this happen!!”

—- snip a few minutes of catching up and chit chat —-

I couldn’t resist, “Maga, she’s at least 1.5 times fatter than the last time I saw her! And, it’s been less than an year!”

Another one said, “Oh maga, u dint know? She got married about 6 months back. See that white dumass next to her, he’s her husband.”

Me : I’m sure that he must have been smitten when he saw her last year. but now, i dont understand how she became so fat!

Another guy : Happens maga. Look at all the concave chicks around here. If you get a chance to look at them couple of months after their marriage, you’ll wonder how they’ll manage to become convex within a span of an year.

Me : Good that I did not propose to her. What if she’d accepted! I’d have become a khalasi!

So, girls bring this mystery along with them as well! I’ve seen such physiological mishaps happening earlier too. Girls having stop-in-your-tracks looks before marriage becoming fatter gradually after. As a kid I had a few neighbors who got married in quick succession. Gradually, they were becoming fatter, usually gaining prominently after every conception. But even then, it’d take at least 2 years (at worst) to blow up to 150%. What stumped me now was the speed at which it was happening. Barely a year and we get to see this. My heart goes out to all such husbands who were imagining life with a beautiful partner and getting lost in the marital bliss. But seeing warnings like this flash out sends shivers down my spine.

So, back to wedding hall, us friends got back to the chick-hunting. But this time, we were conscious about every choice we made. No body was sending out signals which would confuse the girls that we’re showing undivided interest. Every time we found an eligible candidate, we used to get into hushed discussions about the possibility of the my-wife-is becoming-(very)-fat-after-marriage syndrome.

Salient points of our discussion :
If she is chubby now, she’ll become fat later. For Sure.
If she’s running around and active, the odds of sitting in one place and accumulating weight is less.
Check out her mother. No No, dont get me wrong. We were just trying to understand the family history to estimate the possibility of a blow-up. You know, nipping the bad bud in early stages.
Check out her father also. This one is just a safety precaution. You never know whom the girl inherited more from!
Try to figure out what she eats and how much.
See if and how she is talking to people, if interacting well, whether conscious about her beauty even before other females. That way we could get an idea whether she’d take care of herself, relying on the envy that she’d generate among other “competitors.”

Before we could discuss more, (and possibly write The Book of Love part 2) we had to head back to our homes. Even though we were scared of the possibility of the aforementioned eventuality, we were content with the informal swayamvar that we were treated to.

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A Small Break

Mind and Body, Heart and Soul.

Sounds like a vaguely familiar ad-song right? Yes it is. But I brought this out because its been a roller coaster ride for me in all the above aspects. I was happy just less than 4 months ago, that the final semester of Engineering is gonna be a leisure period for me. What with only 16 legal hours of classes to attend per week, and the innumerable bunking sessions that threaten to reduce 16 to around 12 (or less,) it was supposed to be a nice and breezy affair.

But what conspired was totally different, except for the attending classes part. In spite of reduced efforts to sit in the four walled large cubicle at almost 21 yrs of age, 4 months turned out to be the most busiest time, exciting nevertheless. Exciting and taxing on all the four fronts I’d mentioned.

Mind and Body went hand in hand throughout the time for the sake of working on the project, its two seminars, another seminar on a technical topic, the literature survey for these and blah blah blah. Come on! I was a newbie to all this! πŸ˜› After around 10 weeks of toil, confusion, survey, study, understanding, trials, errors, smoke, and a small blast, I’m done with my project. The report, however, is yet to be done. U see, its natural to expect this ‘small’ delay from me at the end. πŸ˜€

Oh yes! My heart’s been waiting to hog the limelight. There was this junior gal from a different department in my college. She was slim, cute and had sexy hair. Every time she walks, I get confused if she’s putting any effort at all. ItΒ  seems that the earth doesn’t want her feet to pain and that it is letting only her to hover in air. πŸ™‚Β  I asked her out for a date. Poor creature, she was taken totally off guard and she refused after several hundred microseconds of practiced confusion πŸ˜€ . My poor Heart was on a roller coaster ride for this small reason.

Amidst all these exciting happenings, what can my bored Soul do? So, its just sitting back and seeing the play going on in my life, like a jobless person in a theatre. Now its intermission, as the project work is over. The second half of this play means a lot to its success. Exams. This movie continues till lateΒ  June and u can see a post in my blog if any more generous breaks are offered. πŸ˜›

Wish me luck folks. πŸ™‚

Forbiddden Fruit

Whoever devised this phrase, deserves an applause for thinking high. It was a very good foresight on his/her part to have valuable insights into the future generation. I’m grateful to the serpent in the story to have played a very important role and for helping start off a race, which otherwise would have ended up with just two dumb humans. And in today’s world, i believe there are more serpents than one πŸ˜› .

By the way, how many of you think that the the Forbidden fruit is actually being considered Forbidden nowadays? By the time a guy or a girl steps into adolescence (much earlier in a few miserable cases), there are close to infinite factors acting as baits for the fresh innocent preys. It is a noteworthy factor that people whom the young ones hold as idols, portray themselves as a bunch of perverts most of the times.

My experiments with myself have been enlightening not just to me, but a few of my close friends too πŸ˜‰ . Seriously speaking, I felt a distinct change in the way I viewed the world, during my late (sweet)16s and early (sexy)17s. The excitement of people telling that I’ve grown up, was dying down and i longed going back to the days when I could play or be with anyone, anytime to my hearts content. (This is reflected in My Blogosphere). Digesting the fact that i can never, ever grow younger, there was no other choice but to have fun, however it may fit in.

It was an illusion of open secret in the society that “fun” in today’s world meant “girls”, if it was not alcohol, smoking and, indecent in common. What made it even more tempting to lay hands upon the forbidden fruit was that everybody were curious – Adam, Eve, Snake and the fruit also, wondering if the old story repeats. As for the answer to this curiosity, the current affairs, movies, media, Internet, email-forwards and sheer imagination should provide interesting answers.

Now, why am I beating up this topic when i too have experienced it? The answer is simple. I strongly feel that people are exposed to the concept of copulation in an unreasonable manner, which makes the very process appear sinful and forbidden to the immature mind. Where as, rationally speaking, it should have been every dutiful parent’s job to make the younger, ignorant generation think logically and understand that everything in life has a proper timing to occur. This probably was the part to be played by the much-disputed ‘Sex Education’. Unfortunately, due to illogical fears of perverting the young minds, the idea met its grave.

Nevertheless, in blogosphere, I suppose we are free to discuss this sensitive matter without bothering about any social hurdle. I wrote this post not to condemn the way this society is, but to look for remedies from my blog-companions, which could solve the problem efficiently and avoid sexual frustration (at least) early in Life. I believe that the remedies-to-be-stated will help anyone who wishes to be a worthy parent.